While visiting some of my J.A.T.S. (Jolly Assistants To Santa) in Kentucky, I enjoyed listening to my helpers discuss the questions asked by children.

“Sometimes kids will come up to me and say things like, ‘How do I know you’re the real Santa?’” Ed shook his head and grinned. “Never sure how to reply.”

“Ho! Ho! Ho! I get that all the time when I visit down here,” I answered. “I tell them, ‘You don’t.’ They always give me a weird look. Then I lean in towards them and in a quiet voice say, ‘You’ll know the real Santa when you see him.’ And that makes all children think. Try it sometime.”

My helpers laughed and continued to describe their interactions with children they saw throughout the year, especially in December.

Santa Tom, seated in the front row, stood up. “Seriously Santa, I think there is one question that stumps us all the time. How do you get all the gifts into that big bag of yours and onto your sleigh?”

Before I could answer, Santa Pat jumped up. “Yeah, I hear you, Tom. But I also want to know how Santa finds the right gifts for each house in that huge bag.”

The room went quiet. I could see many of the Santas nodding their heads.

“I think your bag is like a worm hole that the presents travel through,” shouted Santa Pat, “like the little girl in Christmas Chronicles found herself inside, after she crawled into Santa’s bag!”

“I bet the reindeer don’t like pulling all that weight either!” Santa Tom hollered.

When the room erupted in questions and comments, I let the J.A.T.S. continue for a while, then I held up my hand.

The room went silent as all my helpers looked to each other hoping someone would know how I did it. After a few seconds, I said, “Teletransportation. Would you like me to demonstrate how it works?”

All my assistants stared with puzzled expressions. While they mumbled, I grabbed my bag and handed it to Santa Tom. “Check my bag and see if it’s empty?”

After Tom bobbed his head, I smiled. “I understand your granddaughter Sarah would like a Monster High Raven Rhapsody Doll.”

“That’s right.”

I then picked up my Elf Communicator. “Houser are you there?”

“Ready when you are Santa,” my warehouse manager replied.

“Send Sarah’s,” I directed. Then I looked at Santa Tom, “Now check my bag again.”

Reaching inside, he pulled out the Monster High Doll, while the others muttered in disbelief.

“OK Santa Pat, it’s your turn to check out my bag.” I watched him as he turned it inside out to show that it was empty. “Thanks. Now, I know your grandson Luke loves Legos, especially Star Wars.”

He grinned. “That’s right.”

Again, I picked up the communicator. “Houser send Luke’s.” Then I pointed to the bag my assistant was still holding and motioned him to look inside.

Santa Pat opened the bag, peeked inside, and then pulled out a Lego kit for the Millenium Falcon.

All the J.A.T.S. oohed and awed. “How’d you do that?” one of them shouted.

“Green Fairy Dust from the Arctic Fairies. When I leave one house, the elves sprinkle just a little bit of green fairy dust on the gifts for the next house and they arrive in my bag, ready for me to deliver.”

“So, it just works sending things from the North Pole to your bag?” Santa Dan asked.

“Actually, I use it for me as well.”

“Why would you send presents back to the North Pole?” a helper in the back asked.

“Oh, I would never do that!” I patted my big belly and asked, “Do you think I eat all those cookies everyone leaves out for me?”

Most of my assistants nodded, pointing to my belly.

“If I did, Ms. Claus would not be happy. She’d put me on a diet, and I don’t like diets!” Reaching towards the table, I grabbed a few cookies and popped one in my mouth. “I just can’t resist,” I giggled.

“Now let me show you how I avoid my wife’s diet. At each house I try to eat one cookie to see who makes the best. All the extras I put into a sack.”

I placed the other two cookies into a bag, then I pulled out a small jar of Green Magic Fairy Dust from my pocket. When I took the lid off, all the J.A.T.S. cheered as a green glow escaped from the jar. Then I took a pinch and sprinkled it on the bag. Poof, it was gone.

The assistants sat with their mouths wide open. After a few moments, Santa Geoge yelled out, “That’s just some magic trick you learned from a magician!”

“Ho! Ho! Ho! While it is magic, it is not a trick.” Picking up my elf communicator, I clicked the talk button. “Houser, did you get anything from me?”

“Yes, I did Santa. Do I get to eat these?”

“Of course. Thank you for helping out today.”

“No problem. I’ll see you later when you return to Christmas Village.”

“Now you all know how . . .”

“Wait a minute,” Santa Pete began as he stood up. “What happens to all the cookies you send back to the North Pole? Do you eat them when you return?”

“If I ate all of them, I’d not only get sick, but my belly would be a lot bigger than it already is. Instead, I gather all the cookies and take them to the dining hall where Ms. Claus sets out some milk and hot cocoa. We then invite all the elves down for a big cookie and milk party.”

I looked around the room as my helpers sat quietly amazed. “Now when you represent me, you can properly answer the children.”

“Thanks for sharing, Santa!” several J.A.T.S. exclaimed.

“I appreciate all you do to help me out. With almost two billion children, I could not be everywhere to see them before Christmas, but with assistants like you, it will seem like I am.”

“And make you even more magical!” Santa Ed exclaimed.

“No – make Christmas more magical!”

Notes From Santa

I hope you enjoyed today’s story. Stories are posted on the 1^st and 3^rd Saturday of each month, except December. Santa’s next story will be posted on Saturday June 1, 2024.  If you have any comments or if there is something you would like me to tell you about, please feel free to leave me a comment. Until the next time . . .

To read more about J.A.T.S. please check out:

Santa’s Summer Exploration – August 5, 2019
J.A.T.S. Training – March 2, 2020
The White Feather – May 18, 2020
The Real Santa – August 17, 2020
Is Santa Retiring – April 26, 2021

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